I think I'm now allowed to announce this publicly to my millions of readers, without invoking any wrath: I am moving to Northumberland! For I have finally, after quite a few years of trying (well, no more than two, actually. It just feels like a while) achieved a job as a TRANSLATOR. I'll be translating Dutch and occasional German to English, and I'll still be working for the same company as I do now, just in a different place. This is good, because I don't have to worry about pension scheme transfer.
I'm dead happy about it. Obviously worried too, because my brain often reacts to good news by going 'That's great, but imagine all these things that could go wrong!' It's a long way, and I'm not dealing too well with the transition of the situation from hypothetical to actual, because while it was nice to look at flats online and go 'Oh yeah, looks nice and affordable, could live there', it's now a case of 'Yeah, I have to find somewhere to live. Quite soon'. But overall, I'm a happy little potato, because I've wanted to be a translator since I was 17. And I can still command U-boats in my spare time, and in my head.
The exact transfer date hasn't been finalised yet (I feel a bit like a footballer, lolz) but it's likely to be early December. I'm currently involved in a dispute with my terrible letting agents, who took the news that I was leaving like most people would react to somebody spitting directly into their face. It's fine. I'll stick to my guns (not literally, I own neither glue nor a gun).
So Northumberland ahoy. I'll no doubt keep people updated as I try to adjust to the cultural differences between south Buckinghamshire and north Northumberland. Everyone's said it'll be freezing, although I'm sure it won't be much colder than down here. Will it? I do not know. Maybe I will love Northumberland and settle there and bring up children with fantastic accents. I hope so.