I'm hoping my Woeweeks (or woe couple of weeks? How long have I been feeling miserable? I haven't really slept since Friday. I am so tired that I think I can actually see time and sound and things that humans do not generally see) have come to an end. Overall I don't know any more, I still don't know if I'm in the right industry or if I'm the right 'fit' or whatever, but I do know that I want to be. And I like, nay love, living in Northumberland, and am a happy little potato when I'm not busy having a complete emotional breakdown about to what extent I'm an idiot and incompetent, so I've got to somehow make it work, or at least give it a shot.
Yesterday was just a miserable low point for various reasons and marked the very first 'quick toilet trip to have a little cry' that I've ever had at this job (a marked improvement on the last job it has to be said). Today was way better because A BABY CAME TO VISIT US. It was great, I got to have a proper cuddle with him and I was even allowed to show him my desk and give him a tour of the various weird stuff I have on it (including but not limited to a model kneecap named Neil who has a little hat and eyes that I made for him…I'm really not normal, am I?). The baby went STRAIGHT for my massive Thermos flask of coffee because HE WAS WISE. I sat with him in the kitchen for quite a while and about THREE PEOPLE said, independently of one another, that he 'suited' me. I don't really know what that means, other than I need to have a baby quite soon, and also whatever else I'm not good at, I can hold a baby fairly well. I think I could work quite well with a baby sat on me.

babylator
Me and little Fidela Lenina Katienova translate together
After parting from the baby, I could still smell the baby smell for the rest of the day, which (possibly combined with my lack of sleep – have I mentioned that I haven't really slept?) sent me absolutely insane. A wise trolleague sent me an article about how there's a lack of women to produce BABIES in the Faroe Islands. The more I thought about it, the more moving to the Faroe Islands on an insane whim to go and have babies seemed like a great idea. They speak a language very close to Old Norse, which I'm learning on Memrise at the moment. They have grass on the roofs of their houses. It is bleak yet beautiful. They have great jumpers. The only thing is the whaling, but I'm sure I'd get them out of that habit.
Luckily, I regained a bit of sanity later on, which is why I'm not updating from the Faroe Islands now. Babies do not NECESSARILY need to happen right now yes they do. I'm off home after work tomorrow, which I think will do me a lot of good, although the 6 hour train journey may shatter what's left of my frail nerves and I might get quietly taken aside my train staff and asked to please stop babbling about Viking babies in the Faroe Islands. Now I must pack my bags.
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